Happy Valentines Day! Or, if you prefer, Happy Gal or Palentines Day. After all, a day stoked with chocolate, roses and sentiments of love and appreciation shouldn’t be limited to only those who are living in Coupledom. The rest of us deserve some pampering too.
So, let’s treat ourselves with the same tenderness and appreciation as we would give another whom we loved and cherished. All that good stuff shouldn’t be reserved only for a partner. Why not make this a day for radical self-love?
Self-love is defined as “an appreciation of one’s own worth or virtue; proper regards for and attention to one’s own happiness or well-being”. Some believe that it sounds selfish to love and appreciate yourself, and to put your attention on your own well-being. But how many unhappy people who don’t believe they are worthy of love are able to love and appreciate others? It’s true that you can’t give what you don’t have. Self-love is the most powerful form of love and is encoded inside of each of us, we just need to connect with it. Then, and only then, can we let authentic love flow through us and out into the world to others.
And this Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to celebrate your own goodness, worthiness and pure lovability. Buy yourself a box of chocolate if you’d like. And don’t even think about waiting a day or so when they are all half price. Splurge! You deserve it. If you don’t want to take yourself out to a nice dinner tonight, then prepare one at home, or grab some take out from one of your favorite eateries. Take a walk in a setting that makes you feel connected to the natural world, or that refreshes you. Take a salt or bubble bath, read a favorite author or poet, listen and dance to some of your favorite music. There are no limitations, and the only rule is that you do things for yourself that you enjoy, that will make you feel uplifted and loved from the inside out.
You are the person with whom you spend the most time in life, so you are also the person whose voice you hear the most. What does that voice say to you? Is it positive? Supportive? Does it comfort and care for you? Do you talk more appreciatively and positively to your friends than you do yourself? If so, it’s time to “autocorrect” anything you say to yourself that isn’t loving and kind.
Does what other’s think of you bear more weight on your confidence, courage and worth than your own thoughts? That’s called People Pleasing and it’s a waste of time. Even if you could control someone else, what others think of you is none of your business and likely has much more to do with their relationship with themselves than with you.
A mentor once told me that there are only two people we need to please in life. Those two people are the eight-year-old version of yourself and the 80-year-old version of yourself. If both of those people are happy with the way you are living, then you’re doing a great job of living a good life.
So, Happy Valentine’s Day and give yourself some love. You deserve it!